What if…

I’m a bit of a believer of life after death. I tend to think that there’s more to be experienced in a different life once this one is fulfilled. Being a writer with an insane imagination, my mind took that thought and came up with a what if scenario for those who are imaginative and weird like myself.

If you’re anything like me and you come spend 90% of the day daydreaming and having little stories in your head, then you’ve lived a ton of lives in your own imagination. Now, let’s say those stories and random thoughts are more than that. What if they’re actually memories from a different life on a different planet or in some sort of parallel universe? What if  you’ve already lived a dozen or so lives before this one and your soul has travelled millions upon millions of miles to get where it is today?

I don’t know about you, but I’m not exactly sure that’s a good thing. In my case, half of the stories I think of and daydream about are terrifying. I’d hate to imagine living in a world with zombies, vampires, monsters, aliens, etc. In my head, I’m the main female character. I get in trouble a lot and wind up in sticky situations. If, by some chance, my stories are actually memories (I’m doubting they are) then I’ve lived a lot of scary lives. I’ve been kidnapped, I’ve fought aliens and demons, I’ve travelled the world through hell and back just to save the one I love. It’s adventurous and wonderful, yet terrifying and exhausting to think about.

I’m sure my thoughts are nothing more than thoughts. That my dreams are simple stories created by the mind of a person who craves the abnormal parts of life. But, and this is a very bit but, if there’s any chance that they are more than just dreams and stories, I’m a little afraid to find out where my soul might head to next. I hope she’s prepared.

What if? Ha! I’m thinking what now.

Life is full of what ifs. What if I don’t make the team? What if my hair looks horrible today? What if he doesn’t like me? What if she doesn’t give me the answer I’m looking for? There are so many what if questions out there, but only one that I believe we should really be asking ourselves. What if we take all of our what ifs, put them in a shoe box, shove them under the bed, and forget all about them?

We don’t have a lot of time on this planet and I don’t think we should spend it constantly asking ourselves what if. We could focus not on the what ifs, but instead on the what nows. Like, what do I do now, instead of what could I have done if. You’ll never know what could have happened IF you would have done something a certain way instead of the way you chose. Your mind would go through millions of different outcomes and you’d always find yourself wondering if things would have turned out better or worse if you had made one simple, little change.

Well, I’m done with the what ifs. I’m tired of trying to figure out what life would be life if things had turned out differently. Before I self-published my book, I constantly asked myself “What if I fail at this? What if no one likes what I wrote? What if I get a million bad reviews?” I don’t need to worry about that crap and I’m not going to be one of those people who dwells on stuff like that.

Who cares what could have happened. The only thing that truly matters is what happens now. If we spent more time on that, we’d have no room left to wonder what if.